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Age you came out?

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Deleted User 68
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Age you came out?

Post by Deleted User 68 » Wed Oct 18, 2017 1:57 pm

At what age did you come out?
I came out at 17.

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Re: Age you came out?

Post by Axle » Wed Oct 18, 2017 6:48 pm

I think I was 19 or 20...It was kind of an awkward situation for me, but I suppose it is for most people.

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Re: Age you came out?

Post by LJay » Wed Oct 18, 2017 6:52 pm

Don't feel like I have really done it yet and I am nearly 70. There just doesnot seem to be a point to it any more and I don't have anybody to come out to for that matter. My roommate knows. That''s about it. What do you younger guys think?

For me it was a different era than today. I envy guys today who can be open and at least somewhat relaxed.

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Re: Age you came out?

Post by Axle » Wed Oct 18, 2017 9:19 pm

LJay wrote:
Wed Oct 18, 2017 6:52 pm
Don't feel like I have really done it yet and I am nearly 70. There just doesnot seem to be a point to it any more and I don't have anybody to come out to for that matter. My roommate knows. That''s about it. What do you younger guys think?

For me it was a different era than today. I envy guys today who can be open and at least somewhat relaxed.
To think I were to be have been brought up in a different era. It's kind of scary today yet, can't imagine a few decades ago, the 80's were a really bad time. Definitely something people didn't talk about at all... I do think that it will be a long time before the average guy could be comfortable with everyone knowing. I don't tell certain people and I really am worried about where the country is headed. Just crazy.

I mean as far as you go @LJay it's up to you. I'm out to friends and family but I don't flaunt it around, not that I stand out I just choose to kind of keep on the quieter side. Even though where I work I wouldn't be fired for being gay, probably not the best thing to have circulating around about me I don't think....not everyone is understanding and also a small town.

Does make me think about moving and getting another job and moving into a place with my boyfriend... But where can you go?

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Re: Age you came out?

Post by emiliano » Wed Oct 18, 2017 9:36 pm

My mom outed me when I was about 16. Im very lucky and grateful that it was a non issue in my family.

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Re: Age you came out?

Post by TwisttheLeaf » Wed Oct 18, 2017 9:57 pm

My very first crush was on Jonathan Brandis in that SeaQuest DSV show. I was.... I dunno... five years old?

Image

It was obvious. I crushed on him BIG time.

That was my "coming out" essentially, because there was definitely NO putting the cat back in the bag once my very disapproving father realized his little boy was going to be a "shame" for him the rest of his life.

I probably displayed other indications prior to my Jonathan Brandis crush, but the first "talk" about what I liked being wrong was at that age.

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Re: Age you came out?

Post by Axle » Thu Oct 19, 2017 6:45 am

@TwisttheLeaf I can see why. In a way I do envy guys who just knew from an early age that they were gay. When I was growing up I did initially like girls but began to notice guys and I didn't really understand what it was I just went with it and told nobody until I got older. It really started when I got to be in in 7th grade and PE started making you change clothes in the locker room :lol:

I guess the part 2 to this question is when did you know you were gay, not saying looking back now (because everything is hindsight) but at the time?

I'd say when I was 15 I began to realize that I was gay.

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Re: Age you came out?

Post by Deleted User 68 » Thu Oct 19, 2017 6:49 am

Same thing happened to me, when i was really young I had "girl friends" lol but when I hit puberty at about 13 i started to like boys.

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Re: Age you came out?

Post by Axle » Thu Oct 19, 2017 10:55 am

Nelson wrote:
Thu Oct 19, 2017 6:49 am
Same thing happened to me, when i was really young I had "girl friends" lol but when I hit puberty at about 13 i started to like boys.
Ehh, it wasn't exactly the same. I mean I was interested in girls...just kind of changed I guess. I'd say if I were to have dated girls after high-school good chance I would have got married and have kids. Happy? Well that's hard to say in a hypothetical situation. I think I could easily fall in love with a guy as girl but now, being 31 and having a partner just a little late to go back and try to figure girls out at this point.

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Re: Age you came out?

Post by Deleted User 68 » Thu Oct 19, 2017 11:02 am

Axle wrote:
Thu Oct 19, 2017 10:55 am
Nelson wrote:
Thu Oct 19, 2017 6:49 am
Same thing happened to me, when i was really young I had "girl friends" lol but when I hit puberty at about 13 i started to like boys.
Ehh, it wasn't exactly the same. I mean I was interested in girls...just kind of changed I guess. I'd say if I were to have dated girls after high-school good chance I would have got married and have kids. Happy? Well that's hard to say in a hypothetical situation. I think I could easily fall in love with a guy as girl but now, being 31 and having a partner just a little late to go back and try to figure girls out at this point.
Well my girlfriends were at age 5 lol kind of set up by adults cause it was "cute" lol

We are the same age. :thumbsup"

I often tell myself, if gay relationships dont work out i might try staight ones, but i know im kidding, i probably would not be happy with a girl.

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Re: Age you came out?

Post by TwisttheLeaf » Thu Oct 19, 2017 6:56 pm

Axle wrote:
Thu Oct 19, 2017 6:45 am
@TwisttheLeaf I can see why. In a way I do envy guys who just knew from an early age that they were gay. When I was growing up I did initially like girls but began to notice guys and I didn't really understand what it was I just went with it and told nobody until I got older. It really started when I got to be in in 7th grade and PE started making you change clothes in the locker room :lol:

I guess the part 2 to this question is when did you know you were gay, not saying looking back now (because everything is hindsight) but at the time?

I'd say when I was 15 I began to realize that I was gay.
My father started calling me gay (not in a nice way) from the moment of that first crush. He was really into the effort to shame me into being straight. So, I guess you could say I knew from there?

That said, I didn't realize I was bisexual until I was around 15 or so. That was when I first found an interest in women.

And, I then didn't come to the realization I am pansexual until a few years ago (early/mid twenties) when, in a discussion with Gideon, he pointed out that I "don't see people" in the same way most others do.

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Re: Age you came out?

Post by Axle » Thu Oct 19, 2017 10:16 pm

@TwisttheLeaf Very sad that your dad treated you that way. Seems that parents often want to mold their children a certain way. In our case my dad envied us because his dad got older and a lot more mellow than he was when my dad was young that we got to do things he wasn't...to sum it up and he's made it very obvious. You know the whole , "When I was a kid I never got to..." and his thing was that he didn't think I or my sister should be able to do those things. I don't think there are very many people who come from "normal" households, meaning no abuse of any kind. I don't think we were abused at least in terms of what I think abuse is, I know people who had it a lot worse and certainly those who have things better.

That all being said I am glad I'm making strides towards settling down and maybe for once in my life, as such that I can remember, relax. I have felt that most of my life I have been working towards something and not really know what that something is. Like retirement? I mean chances are that retirement or oodles of wealth probably not all that likely.

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